I cleaned out my desk today. Yikes. I’m not a hoarder – normally I’m a brutal junker of everything my family holds near and dear – but my office desk gets overlooked, so here it is, a list of items I’ve removed from the desk drawers today.

3 cellphones, chargers, boxes, manuals.

A gun lock.

A cap gun and holster.

A bluetooth earpiece.

3 sets of earphones.

A thumb drive.

A 2nd generation 40GB iPod.

A set of blades for a knife.

Corroded battery, unopened.

A hundred business cards.

5-year old birthday cards.

Numerous clocks.

Several unread books.

Twenty CDs.

Old bank statements and contracts.

A handmade Nicaraguan cigar.